Skylar Cecily Daynes

Beautiful Skylar Cecily Daynes joined our family on July 31, 2010 at 7:31p.m. We are completely feeling the love and are eating up this yummy baby.



Getting ready to go home...cousin Jessica Daynes and sister Bailey are standing by to help with whatever baby Sky needs for the trip home.



Here's a look at Baby Skylar's visitors while still in the hospital:

Marnelie and her boyfriend Nasir:



Jane (Nonnie/Grandma/Mike's mom):



Big Bro. Carson:



Big Sis. Bailey:




Sammy's friend Holly Lesser:



Big Bro. Jack:



Cousin Jessica:



Big Sis. Sammy:



Dad Mike:



Here's Baby Skylar getting her measurements shortly after being born:



Here's the first photo of Baby Skylar just seconds after her birth: The dr. handed her to me right away for the skin to skin contact. She was crying a bit but nothing too dramatic. This is when we counted her fingers and toes and marveled at her beauty. I instantly noticed that she had Carson's nose and the same amount of dark hair that all of our other babies have had at birth, plus the line on her chin that many of her siblings have, and, of course, the Daynes head shape.

Skylar: We instantly loved you that second that you were handed to us. Even though this is the fifth time that we've experienced a birth...it was like it was the first. You are a miracle and we are so in love with you. Welcome to our family...we hope you love us as much as we are loving you!!!

Why I'll Never Be Pregnant Again...

Need I say more????

Some awful person took these photos (without my permission) and e-mailed them to me. I'm just wondering where my boobs are? I thought I still had a trace of them but according to this photo they just don't exist anymore...huh.

I think I'll just write down a few reasons why I'll never be prego again...just in case I have some type of memory lapse in the future. I'll try to limit it to 10 but I think I could probably write a lot more! This is why journaling is so important, right? So history doesn't repeat itself.

Here goes:

1. I can't sleep. I mean really. I have a hard time falling asleep, I wake up a bunch of times every night and can't get back to sleep, sleep is not my friend right now at all. I am actually up writing this at 6:00am while my kids are still asleep when I could just be sawing some logs right this very second!!!

2. Gestational Diabetes. While I've never experienced this in any of my other pregnancies and feel grateful for that...I've had to deal with it this pregnancy. Although it's actually been a blessing in disguise for keeping me ultra healthy this pregnancy it's also been a huge pain! I miss chocolate cake and chocolate-chip cookies and have decided that I am just not complete without them in my life.

3. Ears clogged. How weird is that? Most of this pregnancy my ears have been clogged like when you have a bad cold. When I talk it sounds all echoey to me and I feel like I'm asking everyone around me to repeat everything that they say.

4. Summer Vacation Cut Short. I love my 2 1/2 months in the U.S. every year and that was cut way short this year. We went to Seattle on June 4 and it was cold, then to San Fran on June 18 and it was cold and then I came back to Singapore alone without my family. Although it all turned out fine it was not my favorite summer and I never want to have a baby in the summer again! (5 babies born in 5 summers is enough!!!)

5. Spider Veins. Just when I thought I couldn't get any more of these unsightly beasts here they are just cropping up all over my otherwise cute legs...one of my best features. Wonder how much it's going to cost me to get those removed after this pregnancy, not too mention dealing with the procedure, etc. Ho hum. This post is really getting depressing!

6. "Creatures" in my throat. I've had weird, white creatures living in my throat this whole pregnancy also. I'm definitely fighting off something but very slowly. As soon as the creatures disappear, new ones take their place. I've had this problem for years with my throat but it is magnified big time this pregnancy.

7. Swollen ankles. This could be worse and actually has only been back a handful of days during this pregnancy but the days that I have them I cannot stand the feeling. Ick!

8. Acne. Irritability. Don't think either of these need any explanations.

9. The actual delivery of the baby and the recovery afterwards. And the work of trying to get back into shape. Oh man...this could entail a list of 10 more reasons not to ever do this again!

10. 5 is a great number!

Although I have to admit now that this pregnancy has actually not been too terrible...for a 38 year-old even, and I'm sure it will all be worth it when that darling little girl joins our family but it hasn't been a hayride that's for sure!!!

Bintan, Indonesia

Mike did a triathlon in Bintan on Saturday. He took Jack over for a boys night on Friday and I stayed with the other 3 kids so that...Carson could play his last t-ball game, Bailey could play her last softball game and Sammy could play her last 2 basketball games.

This is my gang on the ferry from Singapore to Bintan: It's only an hour long high- speed ferry ride.



This is where we sat for a while waiting to take the bus to the Nirwana Gardens: We chose to stay at this resort b/c it was the location for the start and finish of the tri's.



Hurry up bus! Mike's race had actually already started by this point so we were hoping to catch him on the bike and the run portions of the race.



Here's Mike at dinner with his fellow racers and some "cheerios" the night before the race:



This is the starting line for the race...the night before.



Saturday morning; my girlie friends getting pumped up for their race - the Sprint. This is the race I was hoping to do before I became prego. (I think it's probably good I had an out...don't know if I would have been able to keep up with these TOUGH girls!!!)



Can you feel the tension? Don't you love the surroundings?





Mike - before his race. His race was the Olympic Distance and it started at 2:00pm. So, first he swam...



Then he biked. Not sure how in the name of Corn on the Cob he found his bike in that mess...



Somehow he does...and then they ride.




And then he ran...uphill and downhill and right past our Villa - which was super convenient for us cheerios.



Here's Jack & Bailey on the front porch of one of our villas. Jack kept referring to the villa as "our new house." Jack is the only one I know who is OK with the Indonesian standard of cleanliness in hotels...at least it's a step up from Malaysia.




It was also great that the kids could play in the ocean directly in front of our villas - in between their cheerleading efforts for Mike & friends.







This is how all the guys looked in the finishing area...they all look great considering the heat and what they've just accomplished. Anybody want to do it again???



Carson & Jack entertained each other at the finish line with a game where Carson jumps with his entire body on top of Jack. Isn't there a triathlon we can sign them up for or something???



Buffet dinner in the restaurant after the race. Food was terrible but the company was divine!!! Don't we have the coolest friends?

Winding down to summer

It is that crazy time of year when my kids have invitations to birthday parties galore, all of the last field days are happening, parent-teacher conferences, end of year parties, moving away parties, goodbye lunches, last sports games, end of year banquets and trying to get packed for summer vacations. There's a lot going on!

My next few blog posts contain a few things that I've been able to capture over the last couple of weeks as the school year is wrapping up:

COCO CHANEL - Here's a couple of photos of Bailey doing her final report for 4th grade. She was able to choose who she wanted to do a biography report about and dress as that person for 2 days while giving her report to her fellow 4th graders, parents and teachers. She chose Coco Chanel.



(Giving her report to a classmate)



Here is Coco with her signature "Little Black Dress", stylish hat, pearls galore and even a Chanel purse in tow. On her desk was a display of pearls, Chanel perfumes and hats like those Coco may have worn.

We wanted to curl her hair like Coco's but since she had swimming in p.e. that day directly before her report we decided hair curling wasn't happening...but she did scrunch her hair a bit so she'd have a few waves in honor of her mentor!

Next time you see Bailey ask her to give you her report on Coco!!!

One Light Burns Out in Singapore...

(Brittney Dimond and Jack Daynes; snuggling on Easter Sunday at our house!)

Saturday morning, April 3

It started out like any other typical Saturday for us. Carson had a t-ball game, Bailey had a softball game and Sammy had a basketball game. After Carson's t-ball game I took Carson & Jack to an Easter Egg Hunt over at a friend's apartment complex. I received a phone call from Mike while at the egg hunt. It was one of those phone calls that you never want to get. When Mike asked me if I was sitting down and I could hear shakiness in his voice so I knew that the news was bad. It was very bad...our dear friend Michelle Dimond had passed away that morning, unexpectedly; leaving her husband and 6 children behind. 6 children between the ages of 9-17.
It's been 2 1/2 weeks now since that phone call and I feel like my life has been altered forever. The last 2 1/2 weeks have been full of learning experiences that I never expected to go through. I'll relate a few of them and I hope that I can capture everything for how it really was.
On that first day I stayed at the Easter egg hunt for a while so I could take phone calls while Carson and Jack swam in our friend's pool. Then I went into accomplishment mode. While Mike went over to the Dimond's house to be with Michelle's husband Norm...I went to the Swiss Butcher to pick up a huge ham. With the following day being Easter Sunday I knew that I would have a big group to feed. After I got the ham and some extra groceries I dropped the stuff and my boys at home and rushed over to the Dimond's house to see what I could do. There were people from the U.S. Embassy standing around outside the house, as well as the U.S. Ambassador to Singapore. There were adults only as the kids had been sent over to a friend's home down the street where a "cry house" had been established. My girls were over there as well as all 6 Dimond kids and their friends.
When I walked into the cry house it was the saddest thing I'd ever seen! Each kid was surrounded by their group of friends and they were either crying or their eyes were red from so many hours of crying. The two oldest kids came right up to me and gave me the longest hugs ever. It was like they saw a piece of their mom when I walked in the door.
We took our girls home and they had the nerve to get into a fight on the way home. As soon as I said "not today of all days" everyone pretty much got the message that they better shut it fast.
I stayed up for hours stuffing Easter eggs; hundreds of Easter eggs since we decided to take our hunt over to the Dimond's house for the next morning. Somehow in all the stuffing of the Easter eggs I officially ended Sammy's childhood and told her in not so many words that I was the Easter bunny but that I would never admit it ever again. She knew but just had never heard it out loud before. So, more tears ensued. Makes sense since it was a day of crying anyway.
Easter

Easter Sunday

I went over to the Dimond's at 7:15 am Sunday morning and then Mike brought the kids over at 9:00am. It was raining cats and dogs and monkeys from the sky so we had the egg hunt in the house and under their house, where it was covered. As I was hiding the eggs by the hamster cage I realized that the hamster wasn't moving. It was definitely dead. Are you kidding me? I was hoping no one would notice as I got their maid to dispose of it. No such luck there everyone noticed and luckily didn't care. Turns out it was Michelle's hamster. Huh.
It was heart-breaking watching the kids wake up and some of them bust into tears all over again, hoping that the previous day was just a bad dream. Poor Cassidy (16 years old)! She is just beside herself with pain.
Sunday at church was more crying. Norm wasn't there b/c he had to go take care of logistical stuff. However, my friend Caroline drove their 6 kids there and they sat together on a row in the back. It was not their usual row...
It was fast & testimony meeting so Mike and I bore our testimonies and cried the entire time, looking out at those 6 red-eyed kids.
Tiffany, the 9 year-old came up and bore her testimony. She said that she never usually bears her testimony b/c she's too scared to but her mom has always encouraged her to so she did it today for her mom. Her big sister escorted her up to the front, waited for her, and then took her back to her seat. There wasn't a dry eye in the congregation...
After church we all headed to our house for an Easter dinner. We had the Robison's and the Dimond's over. The big ham came in handy and we had a ton of it left. More tears on the couch while waiting for dinner and lots of hugs. Tender moments and moments of laughter were there in between the tears though. Mike told the kids that they were always welcome to come to our house after school if they wanted to and Tiffany was welcome to spend the night more often with Bailey.

Monday, April 5

Today I set up meal schedules for the Dimond's, talked to Norm several times on the phone about what I could do to help, started planning for the Singapore Memorial Service and organized people to go with me to dress Michelle in her temple clothes for her to be shipped to the U.S. I went over to the Dimond's to drop off a meal that a friend had made for them and then I picked up all of the items from the family to go in the casket with their mom. Each child had written a "goodbye" letter to her and prepared an item to put into the casket. So, everyone showed me what they had for her and then I took it with me to go down to put in Michelle's casket. Norm had a small vase that they had searched all over Italy for together, Brittney had _____, Cassidy had a shirt that her mom loved, Haley had ______, Zach had a shirt, Wesley had a shirt that his mom had always hated that he was giving up wearing now and Tiffany had a photo of herself and a toothbrush. They also had an empty diet coke bottle to put in with her and a family photo. (Norm had photocopied all of the letters)
I finally got down to the Singapore Casket Company at 8:00pm, only to find out that the body wasn't ready. Apparently, it needed to drain for 8 hours so it wouldn't have been a good time to put the clothing on her. However, we sat next to Michelle's body and I tried to read the letters from her children out loud. This was probably the hardest and most heart-wrenching thing that I've ever done. Can you even imagine what 6 children say in a letter to their mom when they are telling her goodbye? They all said things like, "I wish I had told you more that I loved you. I wish I had told you how much I appreciated all you did for me. I wish I had been a better son or daughter. I wish that this wasn't really happening...because it's a nightmare. Losing you was my worst nightmare come true and now I am living it. How are we ever going to live without you? Dad says we're screwed. I'm sorry I got you sick. I will try to be a better man." I was crying too much so I had to turn it over to my friend Sarah to read them. I didn't even make it through the first letter I was crying so hard. The only letter that I didn't read was her husband's b/c I felt that I should respect his privacy on that one...
I can't sleep any more because I wake up at 3, 4 or 5:00 every morning with one of those letters running through my head or the look on one of the kid's faces that I've seen over the last 3 days.

Tuesday, April 6

This morning I headed back to the casket company at 10:00am. I had her clothes and an iron with me. This time we were in a better room with Michelle's body and with 2 of the workers there. They actually helped us dress her. She was almost completely wrapped in plastic b/c of her autopsy and apparently that is necessary for shipping overseas. I was honored to get to have this experience to assist in Michelle's last earthly needs, but it was hard. For me, it just didn't seem like Michelle. I've learned now that your spirit is really who you are. Michelle just wasn't Michelle anymore.
After we dressed her two of us waited downstairs for the workers to place her in the casket and do her make-up. We wanted to make sure she looked OK before she left and also place all of the letters in with her for the journey. After they did her make-up she didn't look the same to me so I called Norm and told him to be sure to bring her red lipstick with him to Alabama, as well as make sure the funeral home on the other end touches up her make-up so it looks more like her. Norm told me later that the funeral home in the U.S. did a much better job with the make-up but that he had to focus on her hands at her viewing b/c it still just wasn't Michelle. My friend Shelly, who went to the funeral, also told me that Norm's letter was rolled up and in her hand at the viewing, so the funeral home must have done that too...
Wednesday, April 7
The Dimond's left for Alabama early that morning for the funeral. They had a military funeral for her where Norm actually played "Taps" on his trumpet at the end of the ceremony.
For the next two weeks I worked on the Memorial Service. Norm left me with this job in tears over the phone as he said he needed to leave and would have to turn this over to me while he was gone. The only speaker he asked for was me so I got to plan a Memorial Service for my friend while keeping in mind that I'd need to get up in front of those 7 red-eyed family members, who would no doubt be on the front row staring up at me with those same looks of pain that I've seen on their faces the last 4 days...just great!

Here's what the Memorial Service program looked like:

Welcome: Bishop Nef
>
>> Opening Hymn: Page 111, Rock of Ages
>
>> Opening Prayer: Mary Bywater
>
>> Eulogy: Michael Magonigal (Michelle's father)
>
>> Musical Number: Draw Near Unto Me - by Singapore 1st Ward Choir led by Danielle Lesser
>
>> Remarks: Becky Daynes

> Remarks: Monique Bellevue-Little

>> Musical Number: "Beautiful Savior" - Ingrid Kempanaers, Mindy Lobb, Brenda Bohn,
> Samantha Daynes, Bailey Daynes, Meredith Lobb, Maggie Lobb, Kierica McPherson, Kasia McPherson, Tiffany Dimond, Grace Little, Michal Tolk, Anna Robison & Sophie Robison; accompanied by Rebecca Petersen

> Remarks: Mike Daynes

> Remarks: Sarah Furner

Musical Number: Abide With Me 'Tis Eventide (hymn #165); violin solo by Young-Choon Lee

> Closing Remarks: Glen O'Grady (plan of Salvation)

>> Closing Hymn: page 300, Families Can Be Together Forever

>> Benediction: Ed Bywater

I think Michelle would have loved it.
Everyone's talks were the best that they have ever given. I spoke directly to the children as only a mother could and related to everyone things that I had talked to Michelle's kids about that they were feeling about their mom and then talked to them about continuing to do the important things that Michelle had taught them. This talk brought on all the tears.

Then a friend of Michelle's from her neighborhood talked about being a military wife.

The choir never sounded better...

The next musical number was so amazing...Tiffany started it off with a short solo before all of the other girls joined in. They sang Beautiful Savior with this gorgeous descant...it was amazing!

Then Mike gave this awesome talk on LOVE and told all these funny stories about Michelle in between so he had the audience laughing and crying all at the same time.

Then our friend Sarah gave a great talk about working with Michelle in young women's.

And Pres. O'Grady topped it all off with the MOST AMAZING talk I have ever heard on the plan of salvation. Holy cow...it was better than any general authority's talk from the last conference...I'm not even kidding!

The last musical number by Sis. Lee set the reverent tone for Pres. O'Grady's talk too.

It really was such an awesome evening. The support from SAS was amazing. All of the principals, kid's teachers and counselors were there to support the family.

I did cry through most of my talk but somehow I managed to talk and cry at the same time which turned out fine. There weren't many dry eyes in the audience after my talk. I had warned Michelle's kids before the service started that I was going to make all of them cry. They did all cry through my talk. I was glad that I directed my talk toward them and used their own words to describe their mom. I think that they were glad to be represented...

Mike and I have received several thank you notes in the mail from people in the community apologizing to us for our loss and we are not even the family. Many people at the school the next few days after the service commented to us that it was the nicest Memorial Service that they had ever attended. Michelle's influence really stretched far and wide on this little island and you could tell by how many people attended her Memorial Service.

I had food ordered for 350 people which is probably just about how many people were there...

Now that all of the funerals and services for Michelle are over her husband is really trying to have the kids continue their routines again. It would appear that they are all doing fine as they are all out and about and busy again. I know that in their quiet moments though her family, the kids especially, are going to have a hard time for a long time. It hasn't even been a month yet since she passed away and I'm still having my daily cry. I know the older kids are still really struggling too.

My family really appreciated me for one whole week. They were loving me so much after seeing those 7 family members in pain for 2 whole days. However, it has worn off now and life is back to normal at our house but I still want to follow Michelle's example and be a better mom to my kids. That is probably the biggest thing that she taught me. Although she was involved in so many different things her priority was always with her husband and kids and she served them tirelessly. She's truly an inspiration! Goodbye dear friend...thank you for giving me a second chance to be a better person!!!

Bailey is too cool!

(Bailey, Mike & our friend Sarah Furner at the OSIM Tri!)






Bailey did her first triathlon April 10, 2010. It was on the East Coast of Singapore. So, it was her first open water swim (100 meters), then a 5 km swim, ending with a 1 km run. She didn't train and came in 3rd place in her age division. Her training includes swimming on the Fighting Fish swim team 3 days per week, and running around our neighborhood playing capture the flag with the neighbor kids on Friday and Saturday nights. She never rides her bike. She actually rode Sammy's bike in this race because she doesn't have a good bike.

Side note: After the triathlon I "let her" quit the swim team for the rest of the school year. She needed a break and it's a well-deserved one! She's been swimming on the Fighting Fish for the last 4 1/2 years, with her only break being summer vacation. Hopefully, she will want to come back and swim next year in 5th grade.



This was the starting area. Bailey is back in the mass of yellow swim caps somewhere...



Oh ya...Forgot to mention that Mike did this race too. He did amazing also...coming in 6th place overall out of 300 men. Bailey raced first and got nice, calm ocean water. Mike's race was in the afternoon when the bad weather had set in so his swim was cancelled. Lightning warning. So, Mike did a run, bike, run instead!

This photo was taken after Bailey's race but before Mike's.



At the awards ceremony receiving her medal and prizes. It felt a bit like the Olympics!





The Straits Times Newspaper was there and interviewed her.



This guy was a little bored with the whole thing but is looking forward to competing next year when he is old enough.


Here's the video from her race on YouTube...

Check this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lf3Fv_Y_Ddg

Sammy

There are times when someone just makes you so proud you have to document it! This happens all the time with this girl. I want to document a few things that have impressed me about this girl the past few weeks. HUGE DISCLAIMER FIRST: I don't take any of the credit for the things this girl does. She is a strong, confident person and she came that way! She came into the world bright, determined and sure of who she is. I don't take any of the credit but am still desperately proud all the same!

The first week of events that had me impressed:

Sammy played in her first basketball game after a 4 year break from organized basketball! Let me explain why this is a big deal...

When she played basketball back in third grade she wasn't very good. She couldn't really focus on the game, she was always daydreaming during the games, she didn't break much of a sweat and she didn't really seem to like it.

However, after a 4 year break she is a new player! She is stressed out on the court because she is trying so hard to pay attention and play the correct position. She runs the entire game, sweats a lot and shoots when she gets the ball! She is TRYING and putting in EFFORT now! It's an amazing transformation.

I'm a dork for writing this but the truth is the truth: I kept having to hold back tears while Sammy was playing because I was so proud of her. This is why. It's easy to be proud of your kids when they have a natural talent at something; however, when they take an interest in something that is difficult for them and they try their best it is really awesome. Sammy shot the ball twice during the game and made both of her shots. It was unbelievable!

I really think it took courage for Sammy to play basketball again. If you saw the other girls on the court it would help explain what I'm talking about. Sammy is tall for her age but she looked like a skinny little thing out on the basketball court. Most of the girls are 7th and 8th graders and Sammy was definitely one of the smaller ones.

Good on you, girl!

Another proud moment this week came when she was at her Wednesday night rock-climbing activity. Sammy is a pretty decent rock climber. She has the perfect long legs for this sport, definitely the brains for it and she had some practice at it after attending after-school climbing club at school last year. So, the beehives went rock-climbing for an activity. Sammy's friend Natasha was scared to death and afraid to climb. So, apparently Sammy coached her along the entire time and helped her get to the top of one of the walls. Then, her friend Natasha was too afraid to go down so Sammy decided to stay with her and help her get down.

I wasn't at this activity but I was cracking up as Sammy was re-telling the story: She told the whole story in Natasha's Aussie accent, "I CON'T do it SOMMY, I CON'T!" Sammy didn't get to do many climbs at this activity for herself b/c she was "stuck" helping her friend. However, "good on you" again girl b/c life is so much more than climbing mountains for yourself...there is so much joy to be found in helping your friends to make it up the mountains also!"

LAST PROUD MOMENT:

While I was Hong Kong last week I arranged for Sammy to attend her Cast party for The Sound of Music. I thought it would be fun for her to go to a party where all the cast would be together again and celebrate her hard work!

The night started out according to plan. She took a taxi to her friend Stephanie's house. Then Stephanie's mom drove the girls to the boy's house where the party was being held. Apparently the party started out pretty innocent...they ate pizza and played a game that they had learned in their drama class called "Park Bench." However, the mom and the domestic helper, who were the only 2 adults at this 6,7 & 8th grade party, went inside after a while and hid themselves away from the kids. Yes, there are many parents like this around here. They are pointless and turn their heads when they know exactly what is going on.

So, with no adults around you can imagine how this party started to take a turn for the worse: "Park Bench" became a bit racier, and then they switched to a new game which you may or may not be familiar with, depending upon if you were raised in the suburbs or the city, called "7 Minutes to Heaven." If it doesn't ring a bell let me educate you...it's 7 minutes in the closet with a boy (or girl). Funny thing is that when Mike played this game in middle school it was called "7 Seconds." I'm much more comfortable with middle schoolers in the closet together for 7 seconds...for obvious reasons!

Now you may want to ask yourself what you would have done in this situation, what your child would do, etc. Well, I'm in complete awe of Sammy's reaction. She just stood right up in front of all of her peers and said that she wasn't sticking around for this inappropriate game. So, 2 other girls from the musical went with her and they left that action.

The next game that was played was truth or dare. Funny thing is that an 8th grade boy at the party said to her, "You probably won't want to play." Sammy busted right back, "Is that an insult?" He then replied the following, "I guess I can see how you could take that as an insult but it wasn't really meant to be." The kids all went and played truth or dare but Sammy and her threesome did something else. Peer pressure doesn't exist for this kid. She doesn't have to stand up so forcefully but she chooses to. She doesn't let anyone get confused about her feelings on a certain subject. No gray areas for this chick!

Good on you again girl!

OK..so the last big moment for this week (that I can recall) that impressed me about this girl was last Thursday after school when the phone rang. I answered and handed it to Sammy, wondering who the woman was on the other end of the phone. Turns out, it was her science teacher...her very HARD science teacher. She was calling to tell Sammy that she had just read her research report on macaques and just had to call and tell her how impressed she was with it. She told Sammy that she might want to consider a career in research because it was so good.

Last good on you girl for this blog post!

The coolest part about Sammy is that she doesn't really want any of you who are reading about this right now to know. She just does what she does because she believes in standing up for what's right and good. She does is for herself and for God. I think we could use a lot more Sammy's in this world!!!